It is an indisputable fact that people enjoy touching each other. Many of us pretend we are asexual, yet when push comes to shove that is incorrect. We all want others to think that we do not touch the opposite sex. A girl who wants to remain anonymous told me there is something seductive about sitting around in a circle of girls talking about what it would to be like to touch a man with a 5 o’clock shadow in the most forbidden places. They all pretend to be speaking from their own personal fantasies, however in reality they are talking from experience.
This secret cannot be kept forever. There are a number of telltale signs regarding whether a girl or for that matter a boy is shomer negia or not.
During the beginning of a relationship, the girl will constantly confide in her friends. Such discussions include the yearning and longing for the touch of their ‘oh so cute frummy bnei-boy boyfriend’ who also layns on shabbat, learns ten times a week and wears his adorable little kippa on the side of his head. A few days later BOOM! The complaints cease! It may not be apparent to those of us who are absent minded. However, if you know someone well enough yet not so much that they will actually tell you that they are getting some, it becomes quite apparent when the thirst for the ‘magic touch’ has been quenched.
This is not the only sign of whether a couple is shomer negia. To see this sign one must wait until the wedding. Right after the chuppah the photos in which the couples touch for the ‘first time’ takes place. Depending on how comfortable the couple is together while touching for the ‘first time’ is the litmus test of whether they have been touching all along.
I hope your first touch was as wonderful as you thought to would be. As the image illustrates touch but do not tell.
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